


Love Letters Aren't Always The Best Idea

by bulletincookie



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: College AU, Fluff, Human Names Used, M/M, love letter shenanigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-22
Updated: 2019-02-22
Packaged: 2019-11-03 21:02:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17885171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bulletincookie/pseuds/bulletincookie
Summary: Anonymous love letters seem like a good idea, until they're seen too early and without the "anonymous" part of it added on as well.





	Love Letters Aren't Always The Best Idea

**Author's Note:**

> you honestly shouldn't be surprised by now that this is luxport
> 
> Claude = Luxembourg, João = Portugal okay lets go

João wondered how much more pathetic he could get. Memorizing Claude’s schedule was nothing new, he learned it by accident just by talking with him and asking him to come over for meals. As friends, of course. As Claude’s friend, he needed to make sure Claude took care of himself. Which is why he also knew which room Claude lived in. He would just need to slip into the building while Claude was at class after lunch, and he could slip the letter under the door for him to find when he got back. He looked over the letter on his computer one last time, just to make sure there were no mistakes.

He was a creative writing major, but that did nothing to lessen his embarrassment of the poem he had written. It felt flat and blocky compared to how he would have worded it in Portuguese, but if he had written it in his native language he might as well have signed his name at the bottom in large capitals. After everything he had done to ensure it was not obvious it was him, it would have been ridiculous. He had typed it up to avoid his handwriting being recognizable, he had Arthur begrudgingly proofread it after a lot of begging and promises of overpriced tea to ensure none of his accidental writing tics were there (Claude would notice. João cursed the business courses for making him so attentive to detail.), he even spent all of last night pouring over it to make sure there were no small details included that only João would know. Despite all of his work, João wasn’t sure whether he secretly wished Claude would still know somehow that it was him.

With a resigned sigh, he transferred the file onto his flash drive and tossed it into his bag to take to his morning class. Well, whatever happens, happens, right? It didn’t make it any easier to concentrate on it throughout his entire class. He tapped away on his phone to try to distract himself, his eyes lighting up when he got a text from Claude.

_How about we meet for lunch today at the café?_

João felt his heart skip at the suggestion. No, he needed to act cool. If he acted too excited, Claude would know something was up. _Sounds good, I will see you at 1._ He almost couldn’t keep still in his seat. He ran a hand through his hair, realizing with dismay that he had forgotten to brush it before he rushed out the door. He was wearing the clothes he slept in last night too, a t shirt and sweatpants. Thankfully his room wasn’t too far away, he could have just enough time to run back, fix himself up, and then run over to the café to meet Claude.

When the professor finished her lecture, João pushed his way through the crowd to be the first out the door. He hurried to his room and brushed his hair, then gave it a small ruffle to make it look pleasantly disheveled. He poured through his clothes, deciding on slacks and a button down shirt. He rolled the sleeves of his shirt up to his elbow and grabbed his jacket as he nearly ran out the door again, but stopped and unbuttoned the top two buttons on his shirt. He gave his collar a small ruffle to make sure it looked natural— he couldn’t look too good for just lunch, after all— and then hurried to the café with his heart racing.

He sighed in relief when he got to the café and realized he got there before Claude. He sat down in their usual spot, a couple of chairs in the back corner, away from the din of conversation and ticking keyboards that filled the rest of the café. He set his bag and jacket down to claim the two chairs before going to the counter to order an iced coffee for himself. He would have ordered for Claude too, but he had learned by then that Claude’s lunch order changed drastically depending on his mood, and depending on how much sleep he had gotten the previous night.

João sat in his chair and tapped away at his phone while he sipped at his coffee, even more jumpy than usual. He looked up every time the bell chimed with the door opening, only to be disappointed every time it wasn’t Claude. He perked up when Claude finally did walk in, and João waved his hand to get his attention.

Claude brightened up and strode over to sit down in the cushioned chair across from him. “Good afternoon João,” he said. João wished that calm, smooth voice didn’t make his heart skip like it did.

“Good morning— er, afternoon,” João replied, taking a long drink of his coffee.

“How has your day been?”

“I barely remember anything from class this morning.”

“Oh? Is something the matter?”

João nearly choked on his coffee at the question. Was Claude onto him? Did Arthur snitch to him about João’s plans? No, Arthur was a jerk, but not that much of a jerk, right? “No. I, er, was just tired. I was up late last night. Watching…cat videos.”

“Cat videos?” Claude repeated, then laughed. “They are cute, aren’t they? It’s a shame though, there was a lovely sunrise this morning.”

“You were awake that early?” João asked, his brow furrowing in worry.

“There is a presentation that I have to give today. I wanted to make sure everything was perfect,” Claude explained, then straightened up slightly. “That reminds me, I need to…” He trailed off as he rifled through his bag, pulling his laptop out. He paused for a moment, his frown deepening as he looked through it one more time, even checking the side pockets and pulling everything out of his bag to check the bottom of it. “Oh no,” he mumbled.

“What’s wrong?”

“My USB stick,” Claude explained, standing up and checking his pockets. “I’m sorry, I can’t stay for lunch. I might have just enough time to get it from my room and—”

“Wait,” João said. After a quick search through his own bag, he pulled out his flash drive and held it out to Claude. “You can use mine. Just give it back when I see you next, yeah?”

Claude visibly relaxed as he took the flash drive and sank back down into the chair. “Thank you,” he sighed. He took out his ID card and handed it to João. “Would you go order for me? A large black coffee, and whatever sandwich they have up there.”

João nodded and went up to the counter, peeking a glance over at Claude while he waited for the coffee to be made. The way he was concentrating on his presentation was endearing, with one hand clasped over his mouth in thought while the other scrolled through it one last time. João smiled and gave a small wave when Claude turned to look at him, and João hoped the noise in the rest of the café drowned out how hard his heart was hammering in his chest when Claude returned the smile before turning back to his laptop.

Once João got Claude’s coffee, he returned to their spot and set the coffee and paper bag down on the table between them. He sat down and smiled at Claude, noting the light flush on his cheeks. João wondered how he managed to be so focused on presentations.

“Sorry, I had to make some final tweaks on this,” Claude sighed. “It’s a large part of my grade, you know.”

“Don’t worry, you always give good presentations,” João assured him. It was true, whenever Claude started on a topic he was particularly passionate about, it was difficult not to be enraptured by the way he spoke about it. Then again, João was always captivated by the way Claude spoke about anything.

“You do not mind if I keep this for the day?” Claude asked with a gesture to the flash drive.

João scoffed and waved it off. “I barely use it. Don’t worry about it.”

“Thank you,” Claude said with a light smile, and João had to take a drink of his iced coffee in a poor attempt to calm the heat rising to his cheeks.

The two continued to chat while Claude ate his lunch surprisingly quickly. The worries that troubled him just an hour ago had completely flown out of João’s head. The only thing that he thought about was that he was with Claude, and Claude even made a comment about how nice he looked.

All too soon for João’s liking, Claude grabbed his coffee and got to his feet. “I should head to class,” Claude mused once he checked the time. “I want to make sure I get a good seat.” He smiled and opened his free arm to João. “Can I get a hug for good luck?”

João immediately scrambled to his feet. “Of course,” he said, and wound his arms around Claude’s shoulders as Claude’s arm wrapped around his waist. João tried not to melt too much into the hug, but it was hard not to notice how warm Claude was, and how comfortable he was to hug. João wished he could stay there forever. However, much to his disappointment, Claude had to go to class, which meant pulling away.

“Perhaps we can meet up and I can give you your USB back by the end of the day?” Claude suggested.

“Yeah that sounds good,” João sighed, still feeling like he was floating from the tight hug. He sat to finish his iced coffee while Claude left.

Once he was finished, he went back to his room, his heart doing flips in his chest. He noticed the envelope sitting on his desk and sighed. Right, he needed to go to the library and print off—

He stopped dead in his tracks as his joy turned into ice cold dread. He left the letter on the flash drive. Which Claude now had.

“Fuuuuuuck,” João groaned as he sank down onto his bed, his head in his hands. Maybe it wasn’t all that bad. Claude was polite, surely he wouldn’t go through João’s files right? Even if it was titled “letter for Jean”. Yeah, Claude would just ask him about it instead of looking through it, he reassured himself. He was still safe. He just needed an excuse for why something on his flash drive was titled like that. It was a school project, perhaps? Yeah, that sounded convincing. A project where they had to write to one of their closest friends.

His mind cleared, João slipped out of his clothes and laid down under his blankets. He had some time to take a nap before Claude would be texting him about meeting up to get his USB back.

João could not have been more wrong in his assumption, however. When Claude saw the file labeled as a letter for him, his curiosity got the better of him and he opened it up to scan over it while João ordered his coffee and food. It was difficult to act normally with João after that, he had to bring it up when he had more time to ask about it and hear João’s full explanation, though the letter itself seemed clear enough. João’s words always flowed so beautifully.

But reading it for himself, to read that the teal of his eyes reminded João of the sea that he wished for so fondly, that his voice was smoother and sweeter than the purest stream…it almost was too much for him. Even after he finished his presentation, Claude’s throat felt tight when his fingers closed around the USB. He turned it over in his hands and rolled it between his fingers, marveling down at it like it was gold. He had saved a copy of the letter on his laptop, just in case, but it still felt surreal that João’s heart was poured into this tiny flash drive.

Claude wondered what João was planning on doing with the letter. Would he give it to him eventually? How long would it take? Would he receive it at all? He had to test the waters, at least. A small nudge, to get the ball rolling.

João was shocked awake by his phone ringing. He propped himself up on an elbow and squinted at his phone, seeing it was Claude calling. He flopped back down onto the bed as he answered it and held it to his ear.

“Mm hello?” he mumbled, his voice partially muffled by the pillow. He heard a small laugh come from the phone.

“I’m sorry, did I wake you up?”

“No, no. I was…” João interrupted himself with a yawn. “I was already awake, only trying to wake up more.”

“If you say so. I’m out of class now, would you be able to meet for dinner a bit early?”

“Dinner?”

“So I can give you back your USB?”

João bolted upright at the reminder. “Right! Yes. Er..” Should he ask whether Claude looked at anything? No, he needed to have trust in his friend. He checked the time. “I can be ready in thirty minutes,” he said. It would take him five, but he didn’t want to seem lazy to Claude.

“Sounds good. I’ll come by your room.”

“I can meet you at the café,” João suggested, thinking it would be their usual go to for meals.

“I want to try somewhere else in town. It won’t be too far of a walk, I promise.”

“Okay,” João sighed. He hung up and ran a hand through his hair with a deep sigh. Maybe Claude didn’t even notice the letter. He would have to wait and see.

While João waited, he paced endlessly in his room. He checked himself in the mirror to make sure his hair looked good, went back to pacing, then would pass in front of the mirror again to check something different. The knock on the door still felt like it came too soon. He checked himself one last time, combed his fingers through his hair, then finally opened the door. His bright smile fell in shock when he saw Claude dressed up in a suit and tie, with his hair slicked back.

“You look…nice,” João choked out.

“Thank you, you look good as ever,” Claude complimented. He stepped away to let João step out and lock his room’s door behind him.

“I’m not under dressed for where we are going, right?” João asked as he walked outside with Claude.

“No, you will be alright,” Claude reassured him. “There is a talk I have to attend after dinner, and dressing up is required.”

“We can grab something fast if you are on a time crunch—’

“Don’t worry, there will be plenty of time for us to sit down and talk.” Claude gave João’s shoulder a squeeze. “I got ready before dinner so that we had time.”

João felt his cheeks warm at the affectionate squeeze and he gave Claude a weak smile in return. “That’s good. Did your presentation go well?”

Claude sighed and suppressed a grimace. “I hope it went well.” He looked at João and smiled. “But, I have something much more important to worry about now.”

“The talk?” João asked, his brow furrowing.

Claude looked at him surprised for a moment then laughed. “No, dinner with you of course.” He stopped and looked up at a sign. “Oh, we're here.”

João barely registered the place they walked into, too distracted by Claude's comment. Maybe he was just reading too much into it. He followed Claude inside and glanced around. Lamps covered by stained glass hung over covered tables and booths, and calm music drifted over the quiet conversations being held. Everyone seemed to be dressed up, and João bit the inside of his cheek.

“Claude, are you sure about this?” he whispered.

“Of course. Don't worry,” Claude replied, resting a hand on João's back.

A host dressed in a suit with a bowtie led them to a table near the back, and a waiter handed them the menu and set a pitcher of ice water down with two glasses for them. João took one look at the menu and choked at the prices.

“Claude, er..maybe we should just have drinks here and go,” he suggested in a whisper.

Claude paused in pouring them both water and looked at him. “Do you not like it?” he asked.

“It's great, but I can't afford it.”

“I'll pay for it,” Claude assured him, setting the pitcher down. “It was my idea, after all.”

“Are you sure? I can cook us something.”

“Don't worry about it.”

João sighed and looked down at the menu again, trying to ignore the numbers listed. He didn't think much of the foot nudging his leg, the table was narrow after all, though his skin prickled when Claude continued to drag his foot up and down along his calf.

“What are you doing?” João asked.

“Thinking.”

“...That is _your_ foot, right?”

“Do you want me to stop?”

“No.” João flushed, realizing he spoke too quickly. “I mean, ah, I don't mind. If it helps you think.”

Claude chuckled and looked back down at his menu, the amused smile lingering on his face for a few moments. João tried to focus on the menu, but it was impossible to not stare at the way the low light danced over Claude's features. His thick lashes cast shadows on his sharp cheekbones, and João had to fight the urge to reach across and brush away a strand of hair that fell just barely into his face. Even with the gel, those beige locks looked almost too soft. João wished too many times that he could run his fingers through them, to grip onto Claude's hair as those soft, pale pink lips stole the breath from him with kiss after kiss--

“Do you see something you like?”

João jumped in surprise at the question, and flushed in embarrassment at the mischievous smile on Claude's face. He quickly ducked his head, hoping that it wasn't too obvious he was staring. “Uh..I think, hm..the....salmon?” he muttered, though it came out more like a question. He didn't notice the crinkling of paper unfolding, too busy keeping his eyes glued to the menu instead of at Claude.

“Are you sure you don't want...” Claude cleared his throat, then lowered his voice. “'Teal eyes that sparkle brighter than starlight--” João's head snapped up, seeing Claude reading from a piece of paper. His letter. “--that dances upon the waves of my soul which cries out--'”

“Stop!” João exclaimed, his flush creeping down his neck as he covered his face. He slowly curled down until his forehead tapped against the edge of the table. Several people glanced over to see who would dare cause a scene in such a pleasant setting, but João didn't pay them any heed. He folded his arms under his head to bury his face in them, ignoring the gentle touch on his shoulder.

“João?” Claude called out gently.

“You are a sick son of a bitch,” he muttered, his voice muffled by his arms.

“May I explain?”

“Do whatever you want.”

“Can you look at me?”

João hesitantly raised his head up, his heart skipping when he saw Claude smiling gently back at him, with no malice behind his eyes. Even now, João silently cursed him for being too handsome. He flinched when Claude reached out to brush his bangs away from his face.

“First, all of those things you wrote about me...are they true?” Claude asked.

_A project. Say it was homework._ João's mind screamed, but there was a light spark in Claude's eyes...hopefulness? Anticipation? “...Yeah,” João admitted. “I, er...was going to give that to you anonymously.”

“But why? I wouldn't have known it was you then,” Claude pointed out, a light frown tugging at his lips.

“I...I wanted to get it off of my chest, but..I did not want to ruin our friendship if things went wrong,” João admitted. Claude smiled and reached to grab his hand and give it a gentle squeeze.

“It would never,” he murmured.

João looked back at him with wide eyes. “...What?”

“João, I brought you here because, hm..how to put this...” Claude stroked his thumb over João's knuckles as he thought. He knew exactly how to put it, he had been practicing all afternoon, but it was cute to see João looking at him, eyes wide and anxious but hopeful. Claude brought João's hand up to press a kiss to his knuckles.

“I love you too João, I am no poet, but...my name does not sound better on anyone else's lips but yours,” he purred.

João felt his mind short circuit as he stared at Claude, at first not believing what he heard. Claude smiled at him expectantly for a few moments, though when João stayed frozen and silent his smile faltered.

“João?” he asked with a gentle squeeze to João's hand. João jumped in surprise, as if shocked awake.

“Yeah? Uh, I mean. I, er...” João took a deep breath in and slowly hissed it out, his free hand running back through his hair. “I...I'm glad. I wasn't expecting you to, ah, feel the same way.”

“How could I not? You are a great friend João, and I am sure you will make a great boyfriend,” Claude purred. “If that is what you want, of course.”

João quickly took a drink of water to prevent from choking on air as Claude smiled innocently at him. “Yes,” he croaked out. “Yes, of course.”

“I'm happy to hear that,” Claude said with a relieved sigh. He gave a weak chuckle and glanced away. “You...You make me happy. Quite happy.”

João couldn't help but note how good Claude looked with a blush dusting his cheeks. He threaded their fingers together, smiling gently at him.

“Are you two ready to order?” the waiter asked, appearing out of nowhere and making João jump in surprise. He cleared his throat as Claude listed off his order, and he muttered out his own order, thankful for the waiter leaving just as quickly as he came.

Claude rested his chin on his free hand and smiled at João. “So...”

João looked back at him and managed a small smile. “So,” he repeated, raising an eyebrow.

“Are you...Are you free for the rest of the night?” Claude asked. “I have a paper to work on, but it would be pleasant to have some company while I work.”

“I don't have anything,” João said quickly. The thought of his own paper due next week was shoved out of his head. “I...I would love to come over.”

“It's a date then,” Claude joked, unable to help a small laugh. João smiled gently, feeling his heart skip at the sight of Claude so happy.

The rest of the dinner went by much quieter than they both were expecting, as the realization that they were now dating took time to sink in. They exchanged small talk in soft murmurs, feeling like it was the first time they heard the other's voice.

When they finished and Claude paid the bill, they walked out of the restaurant hand in hand, their cheeks stained with light blushes. They walked back to Claude's room in silence, conversation carried through gentle squeezes of their hands, or threading and unthreading their fingers.

The minute Claude's door closed behind them, Claude pulled João close, their chests brushing. He brought one hand up, his thumb stroking over João's flushed cheek. “May I?” he murmured.

João opened his mouth to respond, _yes, of course, please, I've wanted this since I first saw you_ , but he couldn't manage the words. He swallowed to try to get rid of the lump in his throat and instead gave a small nod.

João's eyes lidded as Claude's hand slid into his hair to cradle the back of his head, his other arm winding around his waist. João wound his arms around Claude's neck in turn, and it took all of his resolve to keep his knees from buckling when Claude bent down and brushed their lips together before pressing firmer against him. João gave a soft hum and turned his head to press back into the kiss. Claude's lips were as soft as he always daydreamed, and João could feel the heat radiating off of him. He wanted to curl up with him and doze off with that heat pressed against his back, and nearly melted when he realized he could.

João gave a muffled chuckle at the realization, and Claude paused and pulled away to look at him. “What's so funny?” he asked.

“Nothing. I, er...was anxious all of today, about that letter,” João explained. “But it worked out more in my favor than I could have dreamed.”

Claude laughed softly and tucked a piece of hair behind João's ear. “It is a good thing too. If I had gotten another anonymous love letter, I would have only tossed it away without a second thought.”

“Really?”

“Of course, if I did not know it came from you, I would not have bothered. It would not be right of me to give any attention to a love letter while having my eyes on someone else.”

João's cheeks flushed and he buried his face in the crook of Claude's neck. “I hope that someone else is me,” he muttered, though he couldn't help the smile tugging at his lips when Claude brought a hand up to stroke his fingers over his hair.

“Always.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Please leave a comment and kudos if you liked it!! I have writing commissions on, so DM me on tumblr @merciful-mercenary if you're interested!


End file.
